Notes from Lysa TyrKeurst - Central Church, Collierville Nov 21, 2011

A couple of nuggets that she threw out as she began speaking....

• Our goal is not perfection, its imperfect progress.

• God made us as human beings, not human doings. As we look for God's will for our lives we should remember that its not so much what we are to do but instead its who we are supposed to be.


Lysa's talk centered on the following verses:

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

"16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."

She said that there are three commands here from God telling us what His will is for us.

1) *Be Joyful!*

• Sometime when we feel no joy, that's the perfect time to look for God.

James 1:2 reference: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds"

God doesn't say 'BE joyful' or 'FiND the joy' in the trials....rather He says 'CONSIDER it'....just think about where joy might be, even in the storm.

Lysa told a story about her daughter competing at a pretty high level in gymnastics until she got hurt and could never compete again. This led her to really examine why God allows (not causes) trials. She said that the trials are for one of three things:

A) God's Protection - maybe He is protecting us from something that could've happened down the line had we not faced the trial. In the case of her daughter.....maybe a broken neck instead of a messed up shoulder.

B) God's Provision - maybe God is allowing us to find something better. In the case of her daughter.....she then got into theatre and found an awesome leadership role.

C) God Process - maybe the trial is teaching us to grow, to learn, to become stronger for whatever God wants us to do in the future.

Lysa finished off this point by saying - 'I'm not trying to raise a great kid, I'm trying to raise an amazing woman.'. (Liked that!!)

2) *Be Prayerful!*

Lysa challenged us to move away from the 'God, bless me....' prayers and ask Him instead to 'interrupt us, to inconvenience us'. She talked about how its often difficult to really get fired up about prayer, to embrace it and what it can yield. She insisted that we should have a true conversation with God as we pray, asking Him to use us to direct His love to others. Then we should look for Him all throughout the day - look for all of the opportunities around us that He's given.

Lysa ended with this: 'Invite God to do life with you each day.'

3) *Be Thankful!*

Lysa talked about the fact that we've become so good at planning and strategizing and orchestrating our lives that we really require very little faith. When we aren't having to rely on faith, we tend to not be as thankful, or think to be thankful.

She encouraged us to ask God to take our little bit of 'natural' and add His 'super' to it each day. through seeing God work we can learn to have a thankful heart!

She left this topic with this: 'a truly thankful person is a truly peaceful person.'


At the end of Lysa's talk, she stressed that we needed to get out of the rut we so often get into to. The 'woe is me, I HAVE to get up, I HAVE to grocery shop, I HAVE to take the kids here and there, and so on.'. Instead we should be glad and rejoice that we are ABLE to do these things! She said 'I don't HAVE to live my life, I am ABLE to live it. And that is good.'

Be joyful, be prayerful and be thankful and just SEE what God does!

Tribute #11 - Penny Rowan

Tribute #11 for my birthday month (which I'm still celebrating by the way!!) goes out to my most awesome forever friend, Penny Rowan.
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I think Penny and I met at Belvidere Jr High School. We probably played BYB softball against one another when we were younger....but I don't think we met til 7th grade. I wish I could remember how we met.....a class, volleyball, basketball or somewhere else. Doesn't really matter though....what matters is the friendship that we had in school, throughout college and even today.

Penny had I had so many things in common way back when. Off the top of my head;

1. Brains! Yep, we were a couple of smart cookies. We took many a class together back in the day.
   



2. Athleticism! I was a volleyball/softball girl, Penny was a basketball/softball girl. We played competitive softball together during our high school years and both went on to play sports in college.
   



3. Attitude! We both had a bit of a sarcastic side and were equally invincible. Penny and I were risk-takers, always loving the thrill of pushing the envelope. I may have been a little more of an instigator but I'm pretty sure I never had to twist Penny's arm.
   



4. Awesome parents! We were both blessed with great parents that raised us to be independent. While we took that a little too far at times and sometimes ventured a little off the deep end, they did a great job molding us into responsible adults.
   

Penny and I kept in touch throughout college, always visiting during breaks and meeting up at different campuses throughout the state of Illinois. After graduation Penny stayed in Illinois and I moved to Alabama. Today we stay in touch through Facebook and over the phone....we may not talk for a few months, but it's always like we just talked 'yesterday'.

I have so many funny memories of our times together.....sneaking out at night during sleepovers, all those toilet-papering escapades, wild times at softball tournaments and all the instances where we got busted by one parent or the other. I wish I had a nickel for all the lame excuses that we made!! There are even a couple of memories of when one of us got hauled off to jail and one when the other SHOULD HAVE been.....but those won't be described in detail here. =)

My best memories of Penny and our friendship are centered on the traits that make her who she is. Penny is first and foremost the most HONEST person I've ever run across. She might be blunt and may at times bypass her filter, but I can say that I've always loved that Penny told it like it was no matter what. During times when I needed her to tell me that something was wrong, she did it...in a loving way of course. Some of those times I really didn't want to hear it, but deep down I always knew that she was right.

Penny's COMPASSION is another trait that I love. Even back in high school Penny would stick up for the little guy and she would help someone that needed it. After college she went into teaching and now works with kids who are locked up - helping them gain the skills to get their GED and make something of themselves. Penny has been by MY side when I needed her.. .even if she didn't agree with what I was doing at the time.

Finally, Penny and I share a deep faith in Christ. She's been a good Catholic girl (no, I can't type that with a straight face....) most of her life and I've only been a Christian since the age of 24, but over the last several years, many of our best discussions have centered around how God is showing up in our lives and how we're growing in our walk. A friendship based on faith is certainly a special one....there isn't much that can break that foundation. It makes me smile now remembering that she came down from Illinois to Alabama one weekend 17yrs ago when I got baptized. Way back when I didn't realize just how special that was, but I absolutely realize it today.

Penny - you know that you are indeed a very special friend. We've had our moments, but in the end we've come back to knowing that our friendship was one that was meant to last. Sometimes you're my hero, but you're always my friend. Love you!

Tribute #10 - Surrounding Myself with Good

As a reminder - I am posting tributes to celebrate my birthday month. The plan was to give shout-outs to the things that have influenced me, turned me into the person that I am today.

Tribute #10 is a realization of sorts.....a shout-out to the importance of surrounding myself with good.

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I had an epiphany some time ago...it went like this: The people you hang out with have a much greater influence on your overall being than you can imagine. The people we want to be, the habits we want to learn, the skills we wish to have and the character we wish to exhibit are SO MUCH EASIER to attain if we surround ouselves with people who own these same characteristics.

If I want to better appreciate art, I need to find people that know and appreciate art and will willingly share their knowledge and passion with me. If I want to eat better and exercise more, then I can't choose to spend time with people that mistreat their bodies. If I want to be a better wife and mother, I need to spend time with women who love and honor their husbands and are the best moms around. I need to see them up close, observe their behaviors, understand their drivers and strive to emulate them. If I wish to be more gentle and compassionate, I can't hang around those that are always angry and out for revenge. Finally, if I wish to have a closer relationship with God, to better allow the Holy Spirit ot flow through me, then I must surround myself with people that can be that model that I need.

So what? Well, if you, or me, or anyone is unhappy with our behaviors, habits, moods, attitudes, etc.....doesn't it make sense to step back and ask ourselves WHO we're spending time with and WHAT we're spending our time doing? I've de-friended FB friends because their status was always negative or crude. I'll ask people to leave my office when all they do is stop by to complain or gossip. Conversely, I've sought out classes at church to help me learn and grow and have made a conscious effort to grow my relationships with ladies that I look up to and admire.

This idea isn't new but I haven't always tried to purposely surround myself with the things and people that are best for me. I do today....and it's working out pretty well. Find your poisons and rid your life of them....you'll be so much better for it!

Tribute #9 - Riverdale Mill Youngsters (a Haiku!)

Tribute #9 is a short, sweet, smile-inducing haiku written in honor of the 'Riverdale Mill Youngsters' from long ago. We were a group of 'just out of college' kids that spent 1992-1995 or so just plain having fun together. There are some REALLY fun memories from those days! Very few pictures though!!
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Drag queens and HoJohn's

Weekend gatherings at Don's

Good times had by all!!

Tribute #8 - My Birthmother

Tribute #8 goes out to Patti Shay - the woman who was brave and unselfish enough to give me up for adoption 41 years ago today.
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Some of you know that I'm adopted. Many probably didn't! That's ok....it's not something that comes up in normal conversation. Let me tell you a little about it.

Patti got pregnant in late 1969 while she was in the Marines. Having been raised by a single mom, my astounding late grandmother Ginger, she knew that I'd likely have a better life if she put me up for adoption. So, I was born on August 11, 1970 outside of Chicago and adopted 3 days later by my parents.

When I was in college I started getting curious about my birthmother. I think it's natural to wonder what your mother looks like, what your family history is and if there are medical issues to be aware of. I don't know that I ever gave it a LOT of thought....I just remembering wondering where I came from. I sent for my birth certificate, called the hospital where I was born and even visited the adoption agency once or twice hoping to find Patti's name accidentally left on a record or given to me by mistake by an admin. Illinois is a 'closed adoption' state - records are sealed and everything gets altered to make it appear as though your adoptive parents were the only ones involved.

Well....I didn't have much luck until 1996. I called the adoption agency again around the time when Dennis and I got engaged. I suppose the idea of getting married and having a family sparked that part of my soul that was curious. This time was different. The girl that answered the phone said 'she couldn't tell me anything but would take a look at my file'. I didn't think much of it until she called back a little later. She told me that there was a note in my file from my birthmother saying that if I ever came looking that she would want to be contacted. Or something like that. The girl told me that she couldn't give me my birthmother's name or number but would see if she could locate her. Well....she did. She called me back later and told me that she'd located my birthmother and asked me if I wanted her to call her and give her my info. I said I did - so she did and let me know that she'd successfully passed my information on.

Patti called me not long afterwards. We talked forever, sent letters and pictures, and arranged for me to come to Mesa, AZ to meet her in Sept 1996. I remember landing at the airport and walking off the plane.....(this is pre-9/11) and Patti was waiting at the gate. It was a really cool Oprah moment!! TV stations should've been there..

Anyway, fast forward 15 years. Patti and I have become great friends. She now has two granddaughters (she and her husband Terry never had kids) and a super son-in-law. Our family has gone to AZ several times for vacation. While we aren't your typical mother/daughter, we have a solid relationship and I love that we're part of each other's lives. Patti has two sisters and a couple of nephews, so my family has grown that much more.

My tribute is to Patti - thanking her for being unselfish many many years ago and giving me up for adoption.......and thanking her for having the love for me to let the agency know that if I ever did come knocking that the door would be open. How special it's been to get to know and love her and learn so much about where I came from. I love that my kids know her and know what she did and why. I love that my girls can understand how special adoption is and how maternal love is present in so many different ways.

My tribute is to Patti for giving me life 41 years ago today. May I honor her by making the most of it! Love you Patti!

Tribute #7 - Nichole Davis

Tribute #7 goes out to my very first friend in Prattville, AL. Nikki is one of the most special people in my life!
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Nik and I met the way I meet a lot of my friends....on the softball fields. I wrote the other day about the FBC-Prattville softball team and how special they were....well Nikki was on that team. Though we met in 1992, it was a number of years before we really became close friends. We played ball together and we'd occasionally do things outside of church, but we led really different lives back then. I remember a couple of poignant things about those early years. One.....I worked at a paper mill and would sometimes come into church after a Sat night midnight shift. I think Nikki would hope I didn't see her or surround herself with her teeny-bopper friends so I wouldn't sit by her....but occasionally I did. I don't think I realized how much I stunk after 8hrs in the mill. The other thing I remember, more fondly, was Nikki coming by my apt/house not long after I'd moved with a t-shirt. A birthday present. A 'No-Fear' t-shirt (remember when those were the rage?). It was the weirdest, most unexpected thing....but also one of the kindest things. It made an impression.

I don't know when we became close friends. Sometime in the mid-late 90's I suppose. We were pretty good friends by the time I had my first daughter, Sara, in 1998. We were in the same Sunday School class, still played softball together, and were part of a small group of couples that used to go out and do dinner/drinks in Montgomery on Thursday nights. Nikki had her first daughter shortly after I had mine...so we went through the whole 'first baby' thing together. We then had our second daughters right around the same time two years later. *For the record, she kept going and has FOUR kids now....I stopped at two.

Here's where Nikki becomes the soul sister that she is today. After spending almost 10 years in Prattville, AL, Nikki was the first friend that I shared my heart and soul with. She was there in the middle of the night one night when I needed to be heard, to be understood, to be loved on. I needed a friend to know me better than any other did. I needed a friend to simply know me. I had a lot of skeletons in my closet that did nothing but weigh my down and pull me under. Opening up to Nikki and being received with such love gave me the confidence to stop hiding in the shadows and start believing in myself. Had Nikki laughed at me, had she shrugged off my hurts, if she'd reacted in ANY way different from how she did, I wouldn't be who I am today. Nikki is a great mom, a great wife and an awesome friend. She has a heart of gold and a tender spirit. If you don't know her, well, you should.

Nikki and I haven't lived in the same city for over 8yrs now. We still get together every year in the Spring though for Girls Weekend and we've started a Black Friday shopping/ice cream tradition with our girls in Prattville the last couple of Thanksgivings. We keep up over the phone, on Facebook and through email. Nikki and I know that we have one another's backs....that NOTHING could break apart the friendship that we share. We've been through a lot together and have grown closer through it all.

I told you that Nikki was my first friend in Prattville. Maybe my first friend as a real adult! I'll also tell you that if I started counting the women in my life who are the most special to me, that I'd still have at least a couple of fingers left on the first hand when I got to her.

Love you Nikki!!

Tribute #6 - Hunting Camp Weekends

Tribute #6 goes out to the numerous girls weekends spent at Hunting Camp. Those weekends were "the best weekend of the year" kind of weekends!

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I may have the dates wrong, but from March 2001 to March 2010, a group of ladies would venture to the middle of nowhere (or so it seemed) for a weekend in the woods of western Alabama. The property was hundreds of acres of hunting land with an old farmhouse perfect for housing any number of people. The group started hitting the camp for a weekend when we all had small children....it was a 'sanity' weekend and an opportunity for our husbands to really bond with the babies. =)

We started with four of us...grew to six...and had a few years where one would be missing for whatever reason. There was a family death, a child hospitalization, other health issues and getting ready for a move that disrupted the group different years, but we managed to get together one way or the other. All but one weekend was at the camp.....in 2004 three of us spent the weekend in Pensacola instead in the world's smallest cabin. That year was also special because it was me with two pregnant women....not the wildest of weekends!

The weekends would be spent riding four-wheelers, cooking wonderful food and drinking coffee out on the porch in the rocking chairs. We'd catch up on our families, our jobs, our hurts and our happys - sometimes crying but mostly laughing as the weekend raced by. Only the first year or two did we all actually live in Prattville together.....two of us moved away shortly thereafter but again, we made it back, year after year.

These weekends were special for so many reasons. The opportunity to simply relax, to get away from the chaos of the house, the family, the job...this was essential. The opportunity to grow our friendships, offer support when there was pain or hugs when there was joy. This was special too. We shared so much during those weekends.

I'll say that I formed my greatest friendships over the years with these women. At 30+ years old, these were the women that I was finally able to knock down walls with, to be totally honest, to bare my soul. These were the women that cried and prayed with me as I struggled and fought to make sense of it all way back when.

If you're friends with me on FB, you can look through my photo albums....you'll see probably at least two or three albums from past Hunting Camps. Take a look and TELL ME they don't look like fun!!

Tribute #5 - Coach Freidel

Tribute #5 is written in honor of my high school volleyball coach - Katie Freidel. She was my varsity coach from my soph year through my senior year.....but she was so much more.
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Belvidere High School volleyball was strong. As a freshman, playing on the JV team, I got to see just how good the varsity team was and couldn't wait to be part of it. I was part of a pretty strong freshman class - or maybe simply a pretty tall one?? We had our 6'3" Kori-la, 6' something Lynnie and Bruyn who was 5'9" or 5'1o"? Throw in me and Jodie-la setting and some talented back row diggers (Ang/Amy/Pavlak) and we were GOOD. Volleyball was much fun!

Coach Freidel plucked me out of tryouts when I was a sophomore and said something to me that I remember TO THIS DAY. She said, "I want you to be my setter this year but I need you to promise me that you'll behave and stay out of trouble." She had a senior that year that probably should've been the starter, but she wanted to take me as a youngster and build me for three years. I committed to her that I would stay out of trouble and made varsity my sophomore year.

For the next three years, our core group plus the classes around us dominated the Big-10 along with Hononegah High School. Coach Freidel was the driving force. She was everything from tough guy to pushover, from professor to playground monitor, from coach to mom. Coach Freidel knew how to get the most from us! The things I remember most about her coaching were:

1. Preparation was key.
   I remember the printouts she would come to practice with....hand drawn scenarios, all kinds of offensive and defensive plays. We had a playbook in 1986! She drilled us and worked us both physically and mentally and made sure that we understood not only WHAT to do, but WHY we were doing it.
   


2. Reviewing our performance was important.
   We were fortunate to have someone who would film our games and we often spent time in the next practice watching and being critiqued. We heard not only what was done incorrectly, but what was done correctly. We learned and we improved.
   


3. Always do the best you can.
   There were several teams in our conference that we could beat with both eyes closed. However, Coachiela (what we really called her) was never satisfied with just a win. It was important that we didn't play down to our competition, that we didn't slack up because we were clearly better. Good life lesson, eh?
   


4. Nothing worth having is easy to achieve.
   We worked HARD. Two-a-days in the summer before school started, running the track and all that awful conditioning was just the beginning. We practiced hard every day after school....in fact there were drills that would sometimes bring tears. But we did them. We did them for ourselves, for Coachiela and for our teammates.
   


5. Be respectful.
   Our team was never allowed to showboat, never allowed to humiliate another team. We were taught early and often that we should respect the other girls....that they worked hard too.
   

All that said....here's how Coachiela had the BIGGEST impact on ME. She cared about me. Coachiela knew that I had a wild streak, she knew that rebellion was something I thrived on, but she also knew that deep down I was dealing with a lot of things that I don't think I even knew I was dealing with at the time. She became more than a coach to me and the others....she was a friend. She would stay after practice to chat, she'd check in with our teachers and she'd just keep all of us under her wing like any protective mother would.

I've been fortunate to stay in touch with Coachiela.....my respect for her only grows as I spend more time with her exploring our careers, our parenting philosophies and the universe in general. Of all the adults I encountered in my high school years, there is no question that Coach Freidel had the biggest (and best) impact of any of them. For that I thank her!

Tribute #4 - Fractured Friendships

Tribute #4 is a little different. I'm going to focus here on fractured friendships and what they've done to make me who I am today.
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Fortunately I haven't suffered from too many 'fractured friendships'. I've had several friendships that probably had potential to be special at one time....but due to my own fears about getting close to someone, I pushed them away through all sorts of bad behavior. A 'fractured friendship' would be something more significant than that.....it would be a SPECIAL friendship, a close, meaningful relationship, a person with whom I'd trusted everything with.....and that friendship would be gone for good. I can think of a couple, and while painful, led me to be the friend I am today.

One thing that fractured friendships have NOT done is drive me away from sharing, from baring my heart and soul to those that I love and trust. That close circle of friends that I have still get the pleasure of hearing every happy and every hurt in my life. Fractured friendships have not stopped me from growing and cultivating budding friendships - there are a couple really good ones in my life right now that I'm embracing. Fractured friendships have not made me wary of people.....I know that in order to have a friendship that is meaningful and two-way, that I have to be willing to give, to sometimes take that first big step, to open my heart and invite someone in.

Fractured friendships have made me a BETTER friend. To those that have stood by me, that have loved and cared for me, I've amped up message of my love and caring. Let there NEVER be a doubt where I stand. I learned through a book that every small 'thing' that can come between two friends must be dealt with immediately.....like bricks in the middle, if you don't tend to them and remove them, they start to pile up and can soon become a wall if you're not careful. Fractured friendships took me to that book and gave me some great insights on how to be a better friend. Fractured friendships have taught me to absolutely cherish those women around me that are special - to NEVER take advantage of their time, their kindness or their spirit. Fractured friendships have led me to check and double check that I am always being real and never leading someone to believe that they're something more (or less) to me than they really are. Fractured friendships have taught me to really listen, to really hear what my friends are saying and to care enough to respond.

So...maybe an odd tribute? To look back at friendships that have blown up, people in my life that have turned their back and walked away, and write a tribute to them? Yep. Because without these valleys in my life I wouldn't have grown to be the friend that I hope I am today. Blessings sometimes come through tears.

Tribute #3 - Kathy Hill and the FBCP Softball Team

Tribute #3 is to Ms. Kathy Hill and the First Baptist Church - Prattville, AL women's softball team. This is a story about how I became connected to a church, to a Baptist church, and ultimately to the woman who would lead me to salvation.

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I moved to Prattville, AL from college in May 1992. I don't remember what day of the week I moved into my apartment, but I remember that first Saturday very very well. I had seen a large softball complex in Montgomery (P'ville was a suburb) and decided to drive over on that Saturday morning to see softball in the south. Turns out there was a tournament happening so I went in. Keep in mind that I was tough to impress back then....I was a seasoned fastpitch softball player not real impressed with slow-pitch. I realized though that I was officially an adult and that slow-pitch was all that was left for me (sniff sniff).

So I walked around the complex, stopping at each field to watch the teams. I got to one field in particular and liked what I saw....these women almost looked like they knew what they were doing! I sat down on the far end of the bleachers and watched - keeping to myself. It wasn't long that this woman spoke to me in that sweet southern voice; asking me if I knew someone on the team or something like that. I was polite and made small talk with her - she ended up introducing herself as the coach's wife - Kathy Hill. I told her that I'd just moved to town and she immediately invited me to church. Convenient that she and her husband, the coach, were the singles class teachers. (Nice work God.....)

So that was the beginning. I DID go the next day and the next week and probably the next week. While my desire was simply to pick up on this team, I ultimately made some friends, witnessed some joy and became a Christian three years later with the help of one of my teammates.

How bout that!?? Thank you Kathy Hill for reaching out to me, for not staying in your comfort zone with your friends, for caring enough to say 'hi'. Thank you FBCP softball team for welcoming me onto the team and being my friends even though I probably wasn't the most Christ-like on the field (hahaha). Gotta give it up to God too for orchestrating the circumstances of that Saturday morning too.....it gives me chills every time I think about it!

Tribute #2 - Jaylo Fitness

Tribute #2 goes out to a man, Johnny Loper, and his business, Jaylo Fitness. Johnny, his trainers, and the regulars have been such an inspiration to me over the past two years. Honestly, joining up with Johnny has changed my life!

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I got started with Jaylo about two years ago after he started teaching Monday night classes at the church I attend. Several ladies that I know suggested that I 'try it out'....I finally did one Monday night. When I started, I was 170-175# and wore a size 12/14. What began on a Monday night turned into Monday night and Friday morning, then Monday night, Wed morning and Fri morning. For months I huffed and puffed and sweated and ached. But....I also felt better and started to notice my body changing. I got back into running last year as an aside. Although I felt better and was toned up some, I still hadn't really lost any weight.

Last November I got REALLY serious for about 6 weeks. I added another workout day, went on a strict eating plan and did the Advocare 24-day Challenge (supplements and diet). I dropped 25# and am now wearing a size 6 or 8 depending on the brand. In 2011 I've continued with 3 days a week of Jaylo plus 2-3 days of running and have continued to get stronger and firmer.

So that's what happened.....but let me tell you WHY this happened. Let me tell you about Johnny, the trainers and the people.

Johnny is amazing. He's in great shape, he's motivating and he's fun. But more than that....he's SINCERE and he truly cares about every person that walks through the door. He takes the time to get to know your name and hear your story. He pushes you, but with a kind hand. Johnny is a man who is not prideful - he is humble and attributes his success in life to his parents and to God. I can honestly say that I've never heard anyone speak an unkind word about the man!

Johnny's staff of trainers are just like him. They too are fun, energetic, motivating and dedicated. They also CARE about their clients. They're able to push those that are in great shape while tending to the newbies in the back that probably want to sneak out the door. Each has their own personality, their own style of training and their own strengths, but each is determined to give their all to each person that comes running (or kicking and screaming) in the door.

Finally, there are the other Jaylo disciples. There is a core group of 15-20 people that I have met over the past couple of years that are there as early and often as I am. They too have been transformed - I've watched it as I've watched myself. We stick together, we push one another and we check on each other when one goes missing for any amount of time. Most importantly, we encourage one another - either with kind words of praise or with a shout of 'c'mon....you can do it!!'. We are truly a family.

So....thank you Johnny and Jaylo Fitness for helping me to be the person that I am today. I feel better about myself than I ever have and it's affected every aspect of my life. Love you guys!!

Tribute #1 - My Parents

August is my birthday month. I've decided to write once per day about someone or something that has had a profound influence on the person I am today. Today, day #1, is about my parents.

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Mom and Dad adopted me when I was a newborn. Growing up Carolyn was pretty good - we had some money, took nice vacations, hung with the politicians (and probably got to do some out of the ordinary things because of that) and basically had it good. Mom was very cautious, Dad more of a risk taker. Mom was a teetotalling disciplinarian, Dad was a social guy who liked to have a good time. Interesting dynamic that continues today.

What traits did Mom and Dad possess that I now claim? Well....I don't think I'm much like my mom. I love her and am grateful for the leash she tried so hard to keep me on....but we're serious opposites. She's a worrier, a glass-half-empty kind of person. Perhaps those traits are so prevalent, and were so prevalent in my upbringing, that I've gone in the opposite direction. I don't tend to stress about much and always try to look on the bright side. My dad is practical, hard-working and has always prided himself on being honest. While these weren't always traits I embraced I'd like to think that I've come full circle to them.

Mom and Dad moved to Olive Branch almost 5 years ago to be closer to me, Dennis and the girls. My girls are their only grandchildren. It's nice having them close by....and probably best since they're not real young anymore.

Probably the coolest thing about Mom and Dad is that they'll celebrate 60 years of marriage this year. 60 years!! What an example! I know that they've had their ups and downs, but they've pushed through. Congratulations guys.

That's all for this tribute. I love my parents - they've poured so much into my life and I'm glad that we're still a big part of each other's lives.

You look great!!

I have to tell you....it's been nice hearing that sentiment over the past several months. Since November 2010, I've lost 30lbs and went from a size 12/14 to a 6/8. The outward change has been incredible in so many ways. BUT....there's been an inward change too. One that I'm afraid has NOT been as evident. It's a change that's brought me closer to God and closer to my friends. It's made me a better friend, a better co-worker, a better wife and a better mom.

In fact, I think that this inward change happened FIRST....and maybe enabled some of the outward to occur. The change is this.....I've not only realized what a treasure I am in the eyes of God, but I've accepted and embraced it.

As I've thought about the weight loss....I have to be honest and say that I've tried to do this at least a dozen times if not two or three dozen. I've tried all sorts of diets, pills, websites, calorie counters, etc....and pretty much failed every time. The ONLY time I had similar results was after Sara was born and I did a Christian program called First Place - lost about 25# then but proceeded to get pregnant again and lost all that progress!

So what was different this time? Back to the thought of being a treasure in God's eyes. I spent the Fall of 2010 in a discipleship class at FBC Olive Branch where we got down and dirty into the simplicity of what our life's purpose should be. That was, in case you're uncertain, to KNOW God, to GLORIFY God and to BE LIKE God. We dug into those things week after week, becoming a disciple of sorts, or as much of one as you can be in the 21st century. That class threw me into some intense Bible study, some deep prayer and the kind of understanding that I'd always looked for but hadn't had much luck in finding. So my big takeaways?? That God loves me no matter what. That God treasures me in spite of all my failings. That my purpose on Earth is to make known His goodness and that His power will help me succeed as I go forward in that quest.

Those learnings, coupled with a wonderful friend that believed in me, coupled with an exercise and nutrition program that made sense, coupled with the confidence and knowledge that I could indeed to all things through Christ who strengthens me (love that verse....Eph 4:29), catapulted me into a 6-week period of intense determination that I have yet to fall away from. I believe that my heart and my soul were cleansed, that they had become so much more fit, and that that was what enabled me to get my physical self in such better shape.

A three-legged being? Physical, emotional and spiritual? Absolutely. A winning combination? Oh yea.

The Proof of Discipline - Part Three

Can't believe it's been two months since I've written!! Busy? Yep. Slightly uninspired? Yea, that too.

So: back to proof of discipline. Number three was:

3) My clothes fit better (or I need new ones)

Well....I can unequivocally say that I have had to buy some new clothes!! Getting in shape has been costly - hundreds of dollars spent on new dress slacks and shirts for work. But I LIKE the way the clothes feel and fit.

So how about spiritually? How do I relate 'clothes fitting' with spiritual matters and discipline? I'll know that I'm being disciplined in my walk with God when all those loose, baggy clothes, worn specifically to hide what I didn't want people to see, are replaced by clothes that show off the new me. These clothes are a joy-filled smile, not a plastered on one. A spirit of warmth lightly draped over my shoulders as opposed to a big heavy sweater that provided some false fuzzy feeling. Yep, there are new clothes. Woohoo!!

The Friends We Choose.....

This thought has me a little twisted up, but felt the need to share.

This morning in Sunday School, our teacher touched briefly on some old testament history. He mentioned that 'back in the day', when a King didn't like what a prophet foretold, he would often go find a different prophet that would tell him what he wanted to hear. Sounds funny and silly, doesn't it?!!

Well...that made me think. Yea, I know. Happens every once in a while. I started thinking about how we today surround ourselves with people that will tell us what WE want to hear too. We don't necessarily think of our friends as 'prophets', but don't we tend to gravitate toward people that do/say/think similarly to ourselves?

So this isn't always a bad thing, right? No, but it can be. I'm thinking of 'at church'....maybe even (yep) at the church I attend. As a Christian, I may feel as though something I do is fine, it's just a little bitty sin. Surely lots of other people feel the same way. And it's really ok....I mean...it's not really a sin. Maybe this itty bitty sin is GOSSIP. I'll bet that the friends that I keep, especially those at church, ALSO believe that gossip is just an itty bitty sin. So here I am, at church, with my church friends, and we're all having a blast gossipping. It's fun, and we're all doing it, and we're all good church-going people, so it's all ok! Woohoo!! Therein lies my point.

Here's the part that has me twisted up. 15 years ago, that itty bitty sin for me was drinking. I stayed the pious, quiet, sweet little girl at church until others that shared the same itty bitty sin bubbled up around me and *POOF*! Guess who my church friends suddenly were?? We were all good little Christians at church but our afterhours fun probably didn't qualify at good, healthy Christian living. BUT...a couple of these friends have turned out to be my most beloved friends in the world!! Interestingly, we've all pretty well moved past those partying days, kids and old age will do that and maybe if we hadn't we all wouldn't still be such good friends. Either way, I can't feel TOO badly about our becoming friends initially because I love these ladies like sisters.

My eyes are open though.....gotta watch how I congregrate and who I choose to surround myself with. I need to make sure that those that I choose don't just happen to be people that support my bad habits. Not that I have any. Not even little bitty ones.

The Proof of Discipline - Part Two

So, back to seeing the 'proof' that I'm succeeding in DISCIPLINE around quiet time, prayer and overall time with the Lord. Number 2 on my list was:

2) The numbers on the scale will be smaller.

This one took a little longer to figure out....but I think I have. In exercise, as I am determined and disciplined, I end up weighing less. The numbers on the scale DO get smaller. It's all about weight, right??

So, I'll know that I'm being disciplined in my walk with God when 'other' weights in my life diminish. First, the weight of sin. Part of my daily discussions with God are me pleading with Him to make the sinful areas of my like REALLY evident. Clearly, when I'm jealous or think something that's downright mean, I recognize that easily and ask God to take that from me immediately. But its the other stuff, the small and seemingly insignificant things, that are more difficult to see. Sometimes it's the ABSENCE of things, like when I have an opportunity to be caring or helpful and I turn the other way. Another 'weight of sin' measure is how much I'm letting my sin weigh my down. Am I distracted by guilt? Holding on to sins of the past? At one time, yes. But as I get to know and understand my saviour more I stand in the confidence of His promise to forgive. As God unshackles me from these chains, I'm free to chase after what He wants me to chase after.

Second, the weight of worry and anxiety. Ever feel helpless because you CAN NOT stop worrying about 'her diagnosis' or 'his job'? Maybe it's your kids, your parents or your own relationships? Ps 127:2 says: "It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for He gives to His beloved sleep." We don't have to worry and be anxious, rather we simply need to trust in the one who made us, who loves us, who cares for us ALWAYS. So, am I weighed down by worry and anxiety? NOT ONE BIT. Again, the more I get to know my Heavenly Father, the more I live out my determined purpose to KNOW him, the more weight I can shed.

So, do I have this 'discipline' thing down? No...not yet. Am I making progress? Absolutely! For as long as we are walking the path with Jesus our destination will be sure and true.

Wondering what Part Three will bring!

The Proof of Discipline

WOW - I am sore this morning. As I hobbled through the house early this morning, feeling my hamstrings tighten with every step and my shoulders call out for mercy, I thought about MY ONE WORD....discipline.

One of my desires around discipline is to continue exercising, to continue shedding extra pounds and unwanted jigglies in certain places.

My 'a-ha!!' moment then today is that I KNOW that I am succeeding in this area because I have proof in these ways:

1. I grunt and groan with each step because I've really worked hard lately
2. The scale shows smaller numbers
3. My clothes fit better (or I need new ones)

So, my thoughts have turned to what "proof" I'll experience that I'm being disciplined in my quiet times, my Bible reading and my prayer life. What's the equivalent of my short term "grunts and groans" from a couple of tough work outs and my longer term "weight loss / fitter body"? Could they somehow be the same? Let's see.

1. I grunt and groan with each step because I've worked really hard lately

I've already seen that as I'm more disciplined in reading God's word more and spending more time in prayer, that my shortfalls, my sins, my opportunities (that's the business spin of the word 'challenges') are way more apparent. I've asked God to point out areas in which I need to work on or rid from my life and He's not run out of them yet. So, perhaps the proof of my discipline in this area IS grunting and groaning as I'm made aware of my behavioral muscles that need work. Also, as I work on those 'opportunities' (I love that word!), it does HURT in similar ways because I'm being stretched and pushed to change some things.

I'll be back later to see if points 2 and 3 are applicable as well. Happy Thursday!

Discipline - So Far So Good!

My One Word (www.myoneword.com) for 2011 is 'discipline'. I gave a little background on why I chose this word in my last blog post....but after a week of focus I really am starting to understand what this really means to me. I knew that there were areas in my life that needed more discipline, and I've been focused on those, but in the meantime have seen additional areas raising their hands and saying 'Hey!! Don't forget me!!'

So.....in a nutshell.....here are the areas that I'm focusing on and a quick word on how it's going.

1. Prayer! This one is first and first. I've been disciplined this past week to spend time each and every day in prayer.....REAL prayer. Several times I've been moved to tears as I picture God sitting across the table from me and our simply having a conversation. Prayer is not rote recitation, it's not a prescribed checklist of 'you're great, I've sinned, I need and help others' (although touching on all these areas IS important). Prayer this past week has been becoming reacquainted with my heavenly Father and pouring out my heart to Him. Being disciplined in this area has had an amazing impact DAILY on my attitude, my focus, my joy.
   
2. Exercise! While I've been pretty disciplined in this area for the past 18mos or so, I've really tried to push myself even harder. I have, on occasion, taken a few reps off, used poor form or dropped the weights down a pound or two in order to cruise through a workout. I've been pretty successful this week doing everything at pretty close to 100%. I even UPPED the weights and can seriously feel it. LOVE to exercise....I feel so good.
   
3. Safe Driving! Yes, I've been guilty of splitting my attention between 'the road' and 'the blackberry' at times. Honestly, more times than I should. This was one of those things that was pointed out to me during prayer time.....God, show me my sin!!!.....and my carelessness while driving was thrust in my face. Ouch. So, this past week, the phone gets put up when I start driving and ONLY gets looked at if I'm at a red light. Amazingly, I'm really not missing much. =)
   
4. Quiet Time / Bible reading! This one falls in line with prayer....something I know to do and have done but haven't been disciplined about doing it consistently. I've begun reading through Proverbs this week and have chosen Titus (not sure why) as the book I'm focused on. As I learn more about God through this time I'm better able to sense His presence and direction He wishes me to take.
   
5. Work! One area I knew I needed to work on was following through on commitments I'd made at work. While I do a pretty good job and ensure my customers are taken care of....I can be a little lax on some of the tedious, mundane tasks that I'm also responsible for. Or there are those little extras that I should get done that don't always. This past week I've tried to do a better job of planning my days, listing my tasks and priorities, and then knocking them out. This one is tough.
   

So, that's the quick (NOT!) update. So far so good!!

More thoughts about My One Word....

Ok....so I've chosen the word discipline. Here's why......

There are things in my life that I KNOW deserve more attention. Things that will benefit me and others around me FAR more than some of the things I currently focus on. I know that I need to have DISCIPLINE to give the attention to these things that they require.

MyOneWord.org asked me today what I feel the biggest challenge will be to me having success with my word in 2011. What I wrote was this:

I know that I am very disciplined in that which I want to do or those things that I already excel in. The problem lies when I should be doing other things that I'm not so excited about or fear failing in. I find it difficult to have the discipline to follow through with the charge to do THOSE things! I believe that my biggest roadblock will be my schedule...as it stays overloaded I fear that I will continue to give priority to the things in my comfort zone and let the others slide.

So.....I've identified my desire and come face-to-face acknowledging what I believe my biggest hurdle to be. I will also tell you that my DISCIPLINE for the most part has been pretty darned good these past several days....these days since I chose my one word.

Discipline

I listen to K-LOVE, a national Christian radio station, pretty much every morning. Over the last couple weeks, the morning crew has been talking about choosing YOUR ONE WORD http://myoneword.org/ for the year. The thought is,

MY ONE WORD for 2011 is "DISCIPLINE".

More coming soon.....